Upside...Down

The post about my job will have to wait....But now, for some breaking news....at least breaking for me...

Erin is getting married. Erin Wallace is engaged... If you've known me long enough, you know who she is and what this means. Hell, she had been such a big, if not the biggest, part of my life (unfortunately that phrase is past tense...as of two years ago) that I will even mention her by name, something I almost never do on this blog.

What do you say when you learn that the only person you've ever said "I love you" is getting married? What happens to that unseverable connection between your idea of love and the first person you fell in love with? I should be happy for her, happy because she is happy...and I am...for the most part. But there is still that part of me that is alive because she awoke it, because she showed it to me. That part of me erupted when she told me the news. All I have to do is think about it for a split second and my mind starts racing. I can't even put into words how I am feeling....and that is a first.

I guess all I know for sure is that a part of my life, the best part of my life that I will forever cling to, just slipped away. It's not gone, but it's no longer living. It is now, and forever will be, just a memory. The door has closed and the page has turned.

If I seem overdramatic, then my sentiments are being appropriately expressed.

All I can say, I guess, is that this has made me ever so slightly more cynical, ever so slightly more closed off, ever so slightly more... grown up.

Erin, as always, I wish you the best. Be happy. Know that you were, are, and will forever be, what made me the person I am today.